No, Masturbating Won’t Ruin Your Sex Life

Heard some of the weird lies often told about female masturbation? There’s nothing abnormal, weird or wrong about giving yourself a hand. As proud wankers, we reckon it’s time to strip away the stigma and shame and empower ourselves to embrace our bodies and desires. To that aim, we’re taking on five lies about female masturbation that really shouldn’t be getting in the way of your pleasure…

Lie #1: Masturbation is dirty or sinful. 

This age-old myth couldn't be further from the truth. Religious or cultural influences on upbringing (speaking from Team HANX’s own experiences variously growing up in Catholic and Muslim backgrounds!)are difficult to unpick, but many religious taboos around masturbation relate to the concept of sexual activity being purely for reproduction, whereas masturbation definitely isn’t for the purpose of procreation. It might take time, research and potentially even exploring your upbringing with a psychosexual therapist, but the aim is to see masturbation as a normal and healthy part of your sex life.

Lie #2: Masturbation will give you acne.

Back away from the witch hazel - there is no direct scientific evidence to suggest that masturbation causes acne. Acne is primarily caused by hormonal changes, genetics, and other factors such as diet and skincare routine. Masturbation does not directly impact the production of hormones that are linked to acne. In fact, masturbation can have wellbeing benefits beyond pleasure alone. Take erotic film maker Erika Lust’s pioneering initiative: she’s launched a ‘wank break’ for employees of her studio, allocating her team 30 minutes a day to focus on getting themselves off. The aim? Increasing focus and boosting creativity.
Side note: you might find that you have whiteheads or raised, itchy bumps on your vulval or genital skin after shaving or waxing, due to ingrown hairs or friction from underwear/clothing. This is quite common, but if you’re in any way concerned about the possibility of sexually transmitted infections, make sure to have a chat with your GP or a local sexual health clinic.

Lie #3: Masturbation will ruin your sex life. 

This is pure nonsense peddled by the anti-pleasure brigade. In fact, exploring your own body can actually enhance your sex life. Knowing what feels good to you can be a big help in communicating your desires to a partner and lead to more fulfilling sexual experiences. In Come As You Are, sex educator Emily Nagoski nicknames the clitoris the “Grand Central Station of erotic sensation” - and for many of us, she’s absolutely bang on. In fact, a Finnish study showed that nearly 40% of women require clitoral stimulation to reach orgasm. Whilst climax isn’t the final destination of sex, it does make a compelling argument for getting handsy with yourself. Think about it: every single one of us is unique in terms of how and where we like to be touched. Being able to successfully guide your partner/s (in clitoral play, foreplay or penetrative sex) comes from confidence in your own pleasure. Time for a little mutual masturbation…

Lie #4: Masturbation is only for single people. 

Whether you're in a relationship or flying solo, masturbation is a healthy way to explore your own pleasure. Yes, self-love that should be embraced regardless of your relationship status. If you’ve ever been shamed for enjoying solo pleasure by a partner, know that it likely comes from their own insecurities about their performance - plus myths like these that we’re trying to debunk. Masturbating whilst in a relationship can be a great way to navigate mismatched libidos, defuse stress, get better sleep or just help yourself feel blissed out, go for it. Frigging is supposed to be fun!

Lie #5: Masturbation can make you infertile.

Another common myth, born from misogynistic attitudes towards female pleasure, which has been roundly debunked. In some cultures, women have been warned that touching themselves can affect their chances of successfully conceiving or carrying pregnancies, as a means of policing our bodies. To be clear: there is no scientific evidence to suggest that masturbation has any impact on your fertility. So, what does it do?

- Boosts blood flow around the body (this can have a positive impact on vaginal lubrication, too!)
- Temporarily releases feel-good hormones including dopamine, the ‘reward’ hormone and oxytocin, the ‘love’ hormone

Plus: regularly exploring your vulva, clitoris and vagina also means that you are more likely to notice and be able to proactively advocate for your health if you do notice any changes e.g. unusual discharge, spots, bumps or itchiness.

Give Yourself A Hand

Want more?

• Discover our hottest masturbation positions to try out with HANX’s bestselling clit sucker, Cindy.
• Navigating mismatched libidos can be a real relationship test. Here’s how to handle differing desire levels.
• Why aren’t you getting wet even though you’re turned on? Let’s talk vaginal dryness.
• Passionate about pleasure? Find out what a sex positive mindset really means.